YOU KNOW YOU’RE DOMINICAN IF

YOU KNOW YOU’RE DOMINICAN IF

Some of your favorite expressions consist of:
"coño"
"Anda la mierda"
"Anda el diablo"
"El diache"
"Que Vaina"
"Dimelo"
"Ta' To"
"Y Es Facil"
"Que lo Que?"
"A Po Ta Bien"
"Que Tripeo"
"Tu si Jode"
"Ta Cool"
"Ta Jevi"
"La creta"
"Tu ta pasa"
"Cojelo suave"
"Que Bufeo"
"Degrasia"
"Mariconaso"
"Malba"
"Barbarasa"
"Pariguayo"

If you live, or got family livin in Washington Heights (better said Guaachinton Heights)

If people tell you to stop screaming when you're really talking

If you grew up afraid of something called "El Cuco"

If you clap your hands while laughing

If your able to dance without any music

If you learned how to dance merengue and bachata before you could walk

If you point things out with your nose and mouth

If you've ever gotten beat with any of the following:
rubber slippers, extension cord, hanger (plastic or metal), big rice spoon.

If you waste ALL your money in the summer time buying "frio-frio" RED FLAVOR

If you've ever gone outside in rolos and chancletas

If your parents go to a little room in the back of your local bodega
"pa juga lo numero" of DR

If you consider platanos one of the major food groups

If you can smell chuletas cookin in your house from down the block

If while in your country, you hear people on the block yellin "se fue la luz!"

If your house in DR has an oil lamp in every room

If you grew up listening to Fernandito Villalona, Sergio Vargas, and Los
Hermanos Rosario

If your dad or uncle claim to be dead broke, yet rock a cell phone and
is laced wit mad gold around his neck and wrists

If you Drop Liquor on the floor and say "eso e pa lo muerto!"

If you drink Presidente, Brugal, or Mama Juana like WATER

If you've ever gotten whipped by a diablo cojuelo or lechon

If you got 3 elephants in your living room

If your sofas are covered in plastic

If you all the juices you have in your house are the type that come in
powder, and you just mix with water, like Tang

If you eat Mangu on a daily basis

If you ate rice, beans and some type of meat for dinner yesterday,
today and
probably will tomorrow

If you say words like .....
Razor is GILE
Nailpolish is CUTé
Feminine Pads are KOTE
Vapo Rub is Vivaporu
T-Shirts are POLOCHE
Watchman is GUACHIMAN
Garbage is EL Gabish
Cereal is CONFLE (Yea you all know you do it!)

If you believe Vivaporu is the cure for EVERYTHING

If you in a 4-passenger car, u got 7 people in it, and someone yellin
"caben
ma"

If you've ever been in a carro publico ;)

If you use an old t-shirt, towel, or anything as a mop, and use your
feet to
mop

If you've ever let some one throw AGUA FLORIDA on you for good luck

If your house on the island has broken pieces of glass to keep away robbers

If you refer to every cat as MISHU

If your childhood games were called: EL ESCONDIDO, POLLITO PLEIBI,
APARA Y BATEA, EL GALLO, or that game with a stick and a wheel

IF your parents dressed you up for Halloween as a VAQUERO, CAMPESINA,
GITANA, OR HAWALLANA

If your refridgerator has about 85 magnets on it

If all your pots and pans are inside the oven

If your local bodega does lay-a-away/credit plans (fiao)

If a frosted beer to you is VESTIDA DE NOVIA or UNA FRIA

If since you were little BALAGUER has been dying

If you parents ever gave you ACEITE DE BACALAO when you were sick

If you've ever gone to QUISQUEYA PAR

If either ya father or one of ya uncles has more kids than fingers on
his left hand, all with different women

PASS this on to show your DOMINICAN PRIDE
QUE VIVA SANTO DOMINGO